Vibe Check #15

September 2023 was definitely the end of summer. As I write this, the temperature remains balmy in the twenties, but it's dark at seven-thirty in the evening, and the days take turns towards the blusterous, or rain sprayed.

All of the things that can only happen in summer - gatherings of families in gardens, eating outside in the evening, the crisp bubbles in a spritzer or bite of chilled wine, the indulgent laziness of long evenings. They're all gone. They'll be replaced by something cosier and warmer, and the spectacle beauty of autumn. But it is good to observe their passing.

This was the first full month after I made the decision to quit my job (and found a new one). It was a difficult decision, I was in a very physical discomfort while I sat with the decision. When I made the decision I was 51/49. In the time since then, I have become more confident that this was the right thing for me (the human) and my future. The force keeping me, a person who has changed, close to a job, that has also changed felt pretty constant and unchanging. I don't know what to do with this feeling - I don't think it's holding me back anymore, but it was strong and hard to notice (at least at first).

Creatively, this month has been about focusing on quality. As I get deeper into sewing, and closer towards the wedding, I have spent a lot of time this month obsessing over the finer details of trousers. The fit and drape, the anatomy, and finishing details on the inside and out. I have fully constructed two sets from a suiting cloth similar to what I will be wearing on my wedding day. One set of trousers ended up so mis-matched and asymmetrical they were thanked for what they taught me, but then discarded. The other set came out a lot better, but maybe 3cm too large around the waist - so they sit waiting to be altered to become wearable.

My tailoring (both cutting and assembling) has come on a lot this past month. I taught myself how to draft a pattern, using the Aldritch set of mens patterns and Seamly, an open-source pattern drafting piece of software. I also drafted a French Fly (from scratch) and worked with side-seam pockets (not slashed pockets).

The technical details are unimportant, what's been joyous has been this feeling that these clothes are mine. That each little tweak and detail, each tightening of a seam or width adjustment of a waistband, has made them unique and mine. It is a lovely feeling, to feel connected.

Now that it's getting cooler, I have been watching films again, and in September I watched:

  • You are so not invited to my Bat Mitzvah - it's not serious, but it is a lot of fun. I'd recommend as a cosy movie.
  • Elemental - unfortunately the most disappointing Pixar film I have seen in a long time. The messaging and metaphors feel confused. My favourite review on Letterboxd was simply "what're we doing here?"
  • Polite Society - a fun film. It know what it is (which is a little bit ridiculous), and as someone who's never watched a Bollywood film, this film makes me want to watch some. If only for the campy tropes (I bloody love a campy trope)

It's not been a bumper month for reading, but I did finish The Other Black Girl by Zakiya Dalila Harris. I found it a little disappointing, but I admired its courage.

I am hopeful that I will read more in October.

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